After a long time..............

After a long time,
From the hidden stories, to the revealed truth.
It seems similar yet a different drama altogether
It looks as if I lost it again,
But founded how to loose it again.

I borrowed words to express,
I stole emotions to impress.
But I could still be me when in anger and distress,
As I said after a long time there is a progress.

Mild and heavy packets of emotions,
Lovely and sad similar moments.
With walks with similar talks,
With notions making it looks same
After a long time it looks similar but it is so different

If I was

If I was wind who could fly,
would have no limits and set no boundaries,
before reaching your yard.

If I was rays who could rise,
would have come to your door steps evry morning.
Lifted the veil of dark from your face,
would have smiled at you all bright.

If I was drops of dew,
that could melt.
would hav sprinkled my self on your eyes
made you feel how cold, is my melted soul.

If I could read your mind,
would want to know,
how fast is your heart beat right now ?
want to know if you like me liking you.

Look inside yourself

It was bright and colored in white,
It was near me yet so far.
But I could still see it with my eyes,
With a bliss of unknown delight.

See the self in the mirror and
See the self within the flesh.
See the soul inside you,
Beside the worldly glamour and disguise.

You can’t cheat him and you can’t hide
You can’t lie and can’t misguide.
It’s inside you and your basis of living,
It’s more than the conscience you value in this life.

Hold on to you and look in self,
There it appears piled with sins.
You might worry if you did it all,
It’s your soul and only yours who will have to carry all load

Moments of life

There are moments you restrain,
There are moments from which you refrain.
You run and you hide,
You instigate and you mitigate.

You remember some lost names,
You recall some forgotten games.
When you hear that similar sounding line and think,
Oh I have heard it before some place.

Every day in the present,
You carry those past states.
Were you were loved and cared by some
And ditched by some of the mates.

Life is lovely and lovely are those old forgotten days
There are moments which make you laugh,
And there are other for which you weep.
For rest of the memories you cherish they look good buried deep.

If you are different than this is the time

Saturated and full,
Now is the time for your actions than many.
Abstractions if any
Watch them with pity

Rise above the usual
To make up for what has been done
Grow beyond expectations
For what has forgone

Nothing is stronger than your will
Nothing should let you down and make subtle
If you were all than you shall be them
And if you are different than this is the time.

I woke up and it was like a new dawn

-->

I woke up and it was like a new dawn

Smiling to the sun

It seems like just another day

but it was after a millions of seconds of pain

I woke up for a reason

Other than mine

It’s like that reason

Something more than divine.

The past now look like a dream

Were all happened in flash of seconds.

No reason for me to be blamed

And no reason to be ashamed.

I look at the dawn hoping for the glory

And hoping for the light

To guide me across

And away from the dark.

Is it the end or hope for a new beginning with virtue?

If it was in crimson or was it in blue,
The shaken soul hardly had a clue.
She asked no one for help,
Until she vanished in dark.

Fear of the unknown and love for the misery,
Made her search deep and deep.
She was digging the barren land of life,
Still filled with lust and still filled with greed.

She choose, this to be her way out of all,
Thought it might help her to save her soul.
Let forgive all from the forbidden past,
This would be the ultimate remedy on earth.

There she lies in peace, not knowing any noise.
Not knowing love and hatred, for dead or alive.
Was it her who looked so lifeless and so blue,
No one had a clue.
Is it the end or hope for a new beginning with virtue?

Appearances could be deceptive

When I heard the news about so called Swami,”Nithyananda” I was not surprised, shocked or hurt. I think it’s usually the people who are to be blamed rather than an individual. If you believe in some one above human you must not give any individual so much importance and place them equaling God and if you do not believe in anything like God there is no scope for further discussion.

Let it be some so called SWAMI or some politician we always set our beliefs to the extra ordinary set of expectations and than want them to come true.

I mean let’s just list out a simple example of a recent politician linked to a lady related to IPL stake, I guess you know the rest if you don’t please find out because the issue is not what happened but why it happened.

We live in a society with idealistic views were we are comfortably living and want to continue living in veils of our disguised images. Can you think of a lady politician wearing skirts or trousers(In India), I don’t think you would because you are ingrained with a thought that lady politicians In India are wrapped in 5.5 meters of cloth most of the times faded and dull colored ones or to the most modern ones wearing salwar kamiz with a dupatta almost as long as a sari (I know that’s a little exaggerated).

Aren’t we masking the reality behind the veils and not letting the truth be in the most nascent and raw form which is nothing but the truth.

I do not understand how does it make a difference if a minister wears skirt, sari or may be trouser( on more professional attire) until and unless they are good at their work nothing should matter.But In India we believe in deceiving and carrying a deceptive looks, if you wear a sari you are seen like that sati-savitri (she was considered the most pious women) and you wear a mini skirts there are always eyebrows raised whereas the fact is these are just appearances and as I said they could be deceptive.

Living in your own dual lives you are shocked, hurt and let down when some news like these reveal the inside truth. I mean how could you expect some other creature made with the same five elements as you, not be lead away by lust, greed or success after all its human isn’t it?

I think the cultural beliefs should be set on the foundation of transparency and truth rather than making it look like pristine or rosy (when I say look like I mean “fake it”). It’s more like accepting some one smooching in public (you would remember an incident of famous Lady politician and lady business tycoon featured on page1 of news paper) rather than making sex tape inside saffron cloths of a spiritual guru.

Over the past this is not the first incident or the only incident which has shown the hypocrisy of our beliefs or the the deception we want to live in. Whether it is family, relations or outside world we believe in the superficial appearances. If you wear a veil of piousness you are so, whereas if you are blunt with your thoughts your character could anytime be in danger.

The only thing I think before I believe is appearances could be deceptive, so don’t believe what you see and don’t see what appears; try to look beneath the layers and below the surface you might come face to face with the ugly but raw truth.

Silence speak louder than words. Does it?

I some times feel we have been so habituated of the noise that living in silence could give hazardous result. More often than not I have so much to speak that I go on and on for hours, well that may be because I speak to very few people and always have so much to tell them.

However as some one said silence could be louder than words, I yet think how many of us have actually have thought about it.

My college was close to a school however this was a very different school, If you pass by you would never hear any noise, any chaos but silence. There was no noise doesn’t mean there was nothing to be said, nothing to be expressed or no questions to be asked.There were more inquisitive kids than you have seen and more questions than you would have ever thought or imagined.

The other day while I was traveling I met this wonderful kid who could hardly hear and could not speak but I felt so embarrassed when a 10 year old had so many questions thrown at me and I had no answers to tell her.

She had so many questions like were do I live, what do I do, were is my home, why do I live here, If I am married and so many other questions for few I had no answers for few no explanations and for the rest I was too dumb to understand.

I was wondering how much is this kid gifted with. The ability to think and question, I bet any normal kid would ask you all these questions and even be able to communicate to more than their immediate material needs. When I said normal child I did not mean these kids are abnormal I meant they are gifted and blessed more than me or you.

Our life is so much limited to words that even to our most loved ones we need words to express no one understands more or less than that. We have forgotten to understand the unspoken and interpret the unheard.

If I could only interpret signals, there was so much joy filled in her that she did not take seconds to open up to a stranger, ask her the minute details which not even my close friends have ever asked. If you do not call it confidence than may be you could call it being bold in the ruthless world.

In midst of the all the noise if you seek peace, I wouldn’t suggest you to meet these kids but if you seek wisdom and a way out of confusion do meet them, May be they will give you a piece of mind.
May be you will realize that with so many words you still need to find a new dictionary to answer them, may be you will know what is life without words, how to communicate in a language unspoken and actions unrecognized.

I am speechless and lack words may be I need a reference too, to understand the different world of silence which exist within the world filled with noise.

Till I find reasons to live and reasons to forego

Shadowed by the vow,
Moved as though…
You couldn’t take me with you
Reasons to forego.

Catching the summer heat,
Flying in the hot winds,
I still was here for some cool breeze
Waiting to be around, I still wanted Pease.

Sensibilities of falsehood,
Can harm more than you thought.
Either it is love or betrayal,
Nothing could have between the both.

Let’s wait for things to get around.
Wait until I’m in your place,
And you are in mine.
Till I find reasons to live and reasons to forego.

Waiting for you to speak up,or Let me explain you what it was

With dreaming stars, with glittering moon,
The night had more to speak than I thought.
I was waiting for you to speak up, or let me explain what it was.

I was awake the whole night, seated beside the door.
With the noise of the roaring winds,
And watching the jumping tides.

I was waiting to tell you what went wrong.
Either it was dream or truth, but it was gone.
I waited until the morning,still wanting for you to step out,
Not knowing that you had slept in anger, leaving me alone for rest of my life.

I am still waiting beside the same door,
Wanting you to come Out of the grave.
Waiting for you to speak up,or
Let me explain you what it was.

Catch me if you can

Catch me if you can
I am a flying bird, with my wings spread wide in the sky.
if you think you can match up to my speed,
Hold me if you can.

I look up to the horizon of blue sky.
I look beyond you all at opportunities that are bright.
Aspirations of mine might kill you just by the thought
Trust me I will let you fly, but never try to hold me back

You still wan to try? Catch me if you can.

Seated in comfort, enjoying the misery
Can you stand up like me and jump out of the glory?
Loving the luxury and sleeping with your eyes wide open,
You still haven’t learned to dream like me.

Try again and try again until you die,
May be some day you would catch me, trust me only if I want

The Lonely Lane, Where I Found You

Walking down the memory, I saw the lonely lane where I found you,
You looked inane,yet so sensible and so sensitive,
Either it was my views or perhaps the way I looked at you,
the damage was done and there was no room for correction, but you.

I know may be it was me and only me who was wrong,
Lost in the self and your self, you could only blame me.
I am lost but founded, brave but wounded.
It’s easy to forgive trust me but never will I forget.

I Made rooms for changes, changes for you,
Everything changed but, I could never think neither will you remain the same
Moved away from the land, and from the same sky,
I would start again and again make a home.

Never accompanied yet never alone.
I stand taller than you, and will always.
Buried deep in your ego, I hope you find some Peace
And I hope some day you will visit again the lonely lane where I found you.

Yet again religion Vs Humanity or Religion with humanity ?

Whether it is saffron, green or white God knows when we would we stop fighting in his name. We all believe in the supreme (except the very few who say they are atheists) but why is that we all can’t coexist ?

The other day my friends were forcing me to eat non-vegetarian food when despite them forcing me so much I did not eat; they concluded that because I am a Brahmin I wasn’t eating. But I am not some one who follow religion blindly or perhaps even follow religion, in fact I would rather prefer to be called secular and more importantly human (definition: to be humane).

I don't think religion makes a difference, in fact as I love animals and I believe they have all the right to live, I do not eat them. None of my activities are forced by my religion or done by me under the influence of my religion, nor would I ever advocate any one to blindly follow something (whether religion or science) without there own logic.

I think there is something more important and above religion and that’s humanity, I don't think any religion teaches one to murder, steal, or perhaps rape, does it? If it does than you should know that scripts could be amended, altered and modified as one wants them to be.

It is sad to see people fighting over pity things like color of the God or the way he is prayed, Hindus more popularly known by saffron and Muslims by green. Oh can you believe it! You knew it before I could even tell you; we had already divided the colors psychologically?

I have been to different religious places as well as places of prayer of different religions, from Churches to mosques I found no difference except for the difference in the way people think. There is nothing one take with them, no religion, no money and no people, so why is it that we keep fighting for irrelevant things throughout our lives.

I think it is hard to make the less educated understand as the only education they have received is religion, however the ones who are blessed with knowledge more than the mere learning at home should not be held back by the apprehensions and should try to evolve out of these age old bindings’.

On the day of Hanuman Jayanti (If you are a Hindu and you do not know this festival than do not be embarrassed, as this is not celebrated very popularly) I could see saffron color flags all around(Can you believe in Hyderabad) some people carrying it on vehicles and many hosting it in front of there shops. I do not have a problem with the color as saffron is a beautiful color, but it’s about the symbolism people have started using that color for.

It’s been more than a week and Hyderabad still is suffering from communal tensions and if you would know the reason it started I am sure you would not believe it.

Started with a small issue of removal of some flags by Municipal Corporation this issue magnified like a forest fire.
But at the end of the day people who are the sufferers are the ones who were not involved; people who were in house arrest due to curfew for almost a week, had no place to go out and no place to stay safe. The daily wagers who were left with no money and no food to eat, but for the summer heat.I wonder which religion preaches this.

Yet again it is an age old fight Religion Vs Humanity, but I would say why not religion along with humanity? Why do we even separate both, why cant we follow both?

if you can read this I am sure you need no guidance to figure out what is right for you, and the society.

“Arrange marriage” do you think it is a piece of cake?

My mom gave me a choice either I find a guy (with her specifications) or she would find one.

Can you guess what did I do? Well, let me give you the statistic which will help you in guessing what I did.

There are almost 70% Hindus in India that makes almost 0.70 billion, out of the total population there are almost 5% Brahmins that leaves me with .035 billion selected population. The percentage of men in India is approximately 60 % of total population, so that makes it .021 billion men.

How many of those men do you think fall in a category of my selection? Let’s say qualification and age wise? And yes how can I forget my Mom is specific about north Indians.

Now If I divide the population in half ( approximating I can only select from anyone in north of central India) that leaves me with .0105 billion men in north India. The youth population above 25 would be almost 60% of the population that makes it 0.0063 billion men. Now on an average lets say 60% of these are married that leaves us with 0.00252 billion single men.

My parents obviously wont like an average educated guy for a double postgraduate girl of their so that gives me a tough choice with a minimum education of Masters. As the education above post graduation is limited that may be hardly with 1% of population hence I am only left with 0.00252 billion men.

Remember, I am left with .252 million eligible guys. Now did I tell you we have this specific Horoscope match (kundali-chakar). So they see the stars, moon, sun and God knows what all to find a match. Lets say out of those at least 1% match and that would make it 0.000252 million (252000) people left. As we live in an area and cannot meet all the people together the possibility of we able to connect to the number of people out of the total would be 1% that makes it 2520 and I am sure you would not be considering any body single and above 32 so that’s make the choice narrow down to 1% of that hence on an average 252.

So the choice given to me is only 25.2 individuals out of a country of billion, and let me remind you we are not yet done. Half of these I would not like to be with and lets say more than a quarter do not like me so we are in total left with hardly 7 individuals to choose out from.

Despite my selection out of those 7, I am sure there would be a lot of emotional and sentimental drama, I will have to go though at home. so I made an intelligent decision and asked her (Mom) to do the needful.

I think it is always easy to find guys but very difficult to find “the guy”. I am not sure for how many centuries we have a institution of marriage, but I wonder how much hard work is involved in a so called arranged marriage.